Truth in the Mirror

The truth in the mirror... or in my case, the photo.  Well, it's not awful.  Hell, I'm actually kind of okay with how I look in it.  I even sent this picture to my husband via text.  BUT, well, I do look kinda squishy.  As a matter of fact, in my Zumba class today, I kept noticing how nothing jiggled on the instructor and no matter how she moves, she looks sexy.  I know I'm not there to compare myself to anyone, but let's be honest... why are there mirrors EVERYWHERE if not for that exact purpose.  One can't help but notice the different shapes and sizes behind, next to, and in front of oneself.  I wonder what size they wear, where they buy their workout clothes, who does their hair, and how long I have to workout to look like that darn instructor.  "I bet she's been doing this for years, probably her whole life,"  I tell myself.  And the truth is, she has AND she looks great!  So, where does that leave me?  I was not athletic in high school or college.  My sport was finding cute boys and seeing if I could date them.  I couldn't, of course!  My parents were strict on me!  But I wanted to.  And I got a secret kick from flirty glances.  I'm old enough now that I can admit this without feeling sleazy.  I never did anything with that.  It was just fun to experiment with my feminine powers and see how far I could actually take that.... but really - honestly, I never took it too far.  Once I had a boyfriend I was loyal beyond belief!  And only a long term boyfriend deserved anything more than flirting from me.  Okay, maybe I was a tease.... a little.  I'm sure I've been called that before.  And what does all of this have to do with working out and my health??  I dont' know... but somehow it does.  Maybe it's because those years formulated my identity and yet I was too young to realize what I was experimenting with.  Then I got married, had my second child, let myself indulge in all that was pregnancy and motherhood, and let myself go.  My doctors told me I had to take medicine (for my arthritis and eczema) and that made me gain even more weight.  Before I knew it... I was a desperate mess of insecurity and shame.  I mean, really, whenever a person doesn't like to socialize due to how embarrassed they feel in their clothes, or for fear they might run into someone they know... now that's no fun and no life at all!  And now, I'm on a journey to get my sexy back.  Not just my sexy though, my life, my vitality, me energy, and my spunk.  With the support and love and encouragement of my husband I got back in they gym three years ago... we got back in the gym.  Together we began feeling good about working out and even started losing weight.  We played with different foods and brands, and only three years later, here we are, easily ten pounds lighter.  I KNOW RIGHT???  Three years and only ten pounds!  HENCE, this blog.  I decided to put myself out there, and do something scary.  Look, I have a facebook account and I HATE when people post:
"Ran seven miles today". 
The next day, "Didn't workout today, feel bad." 
Same person, third day:  "Feel great, ate a salad and worked out for two hours and a half." 
Fourth day: "Ate a burger but washed it down with a four mile run in 30 minutes." 
Fifth day:  "7am and barely awake, but had a great boxing workout!" 
DUDE... okay... get a blog!!  Are you trying to make the rest of us feel crappy for not working out as much as you or trying to get compliments??? 

So, I'm taking my own advice.  If you're reading this blog... you asked for it - the whole ugly truth!  I have no idea if anyone is reading this, but it's me I'm doing it for.  My goal - easy:  to stop jiggling.  That's it!  I think it might take eight pounds or so... but who knows?  My goal:  no bulge in the middle and no jiggle in my wiggle. 

Do I have to be totally honest and say where I started?  I don't know... but since I'm not sure anyone is even reading this... SURE, why not?  Today, I weigh 138 pounds.  I'm 5'3" and workout 2-4 times a week.  I did workout today, I did a Zumba class and ran 3.5 miles in 41:40 minutes.  Yeah, I'm slow, so what?! 

Now, let's do this!!!  I'll tell you more about my diet next time,  Peace!